Cohenism

I am sick ands therfore anyhtign I write is under the influence of drugs. I have decided that I ma very liberal, I like all religions, it makes sense that there must be somethign good in all of them, and supposedly their common elements would be an appropriate satartign point. They all have one day of rest, so form today I am adopting all of them. Don’t call me on Fri, Sat or Sunday, sicne it is now my days of rest. I do not work on those days. IF you happent o come across a religiont aht takes Monday as its day of rest (how odd) then let me know.

Since I cannpt work on thos edays I am having someoen who is not of my religion (I think I’ll call it Coheism, oops missed an n) to do the nexcessacty work for me ont hose days, like flip electric switches, and flush toilets. Also, correct my smelling, I mean spellings.

I only made one small atart to my rel;igion and already people are mad. The Muslims say taht you cann ot ahve nay more religions becdure thier is the last and best one and theuir day of rest is Friday, and if I change theat they’ll kill me. SO multi-cul;turalims doesn’t woirk, even Chancellor Angela merkel of Germ,any siad so in a speech she made a frew weeks ago, that had an immediate impacet on me. The Germans should kn ow they’ve trtied everything to be popular, killing everyone, likign everyone, but nothign wortks, poeple still disliekt ehm.

The Baha’i are a case in point, a religion (or is ti a philosopyh) that tries to be syncretic, i.e. to com bine the best aspects of toehr relgigons. It startted in POersia, where they now ahv eanother religion called KHomeinism (some prople call it Islamism and toehrs simply Islma, but that’s lazy thinking), and sicne they consider Baha’i as a dangerous heresy (I can’t for the life of me figure out why) they kill them. Yes, in Persia or Iran as it now calls itself, it is a capital crimne to be a Baha’i. Und er my religion n othign that one thinks or does would eb a capital crime, except murder itself, and maybe certain forms odf sex.

Yes, in my religiont here would be sex, otherswsie noone would join it. B ut, sex would be banned between marriage partners, in other weords this would take the boredom out of marriage, wow wouldn’t that be great not havignt o have sex only wiht oen woman, but isnt that what is done in America already.

Not only don’t I beleve in God I don’t beelvie in spelling, so the question is it god or dog (oops maybe I’ve gone too far this tiema dn soemone will get angry with me), but the question arises is the anme of god sacred in onley one language (Hebrew?) or any others, so what’s with “G-d”? I don’t know these questions are byond me, taht’s why my religion will be the greatest. Parties every Fri, Sat and Sun ngiths!

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